Most of the time when you are upset about something, people will try and talk you out of it. They will remind you how things could be worse, that it will all blow over, or how at least its not festering warts in both eyes. I do it too. I always try and convince someone they shouldn’t be feeling what they are feeling because their being upset is boring. It is not bad advice to let negative emotions pass through you like wind out your ass, but when I am the one feeling the pain it never makes me feel better when people tell me to let it go.
Dealing with my own mental anguish I started observing The Munch and how quickly she lets emotions go. She will explode into an episode of rage and tears because her Elmo doll is stuck under the couch, then act like nothing happened as soon as she gets it free. I may tell her not to throw her blueberries and she will get furious, collapse on the floor in anguish, slam her head repeatedly, but then quickly moves on once she finds a half eaten popsicle stuck to the bottom of a chair. She can fall down the stairs smashing her face, but after 3 minutes of hugging is back to playing with her blocks as blood cakes to her face.
Children are so resilient. They are like miniature Buddhas who have mastered the art of non-attachment. When and why do we lose that?
But then I also realized that my child is a maniac who has no boundaries. She isn’t exactly learning from her mistakes yet, and in fact will do something pretty idiotic, cry about it, then try again 20 minutes later. Maybe part of holding on to emotions is so we can really process and understand the life lessons our suffering teaches. That although it may not be healthy to dwell on your pain excessively, part of maturing is allowing the reality of your actions to impact you so you act differently next time.
You would look at this face and think I just told her I purposely gave her kitten feline AIDS….but no… she is crying because SHE threw her stuffed monkey down the stairs