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Are My Wishes Dumb?

When I was a kid I was obsessed with wishes. I would wish every time I saw a star, every time the clock read 11:11, and on every dandelion I blew… which I regret because they NEVER took me out to dinner first.

MOST of my wishes didn’t come true though. I know this because I do NOT have size DD tits. So eventually I gave up on the ritual, and decided to trust what the cosmos had in store for me – a B cup.

Yet, as a new age hippy I am always hearing about manifesting my destiny, the law of attraction, and visualizing the life I want to have. People usually justify these ethereal rationales through quantum physics experiments – and how the observer has a direct impact on whatever object is being observed. The thinking is that I’m supposed to engage in positive thinking to draw positive results for my positively positive intentions.

I guess!? Feels a lot like wishing though… just saying.

According to the spiritual post modern guides, rather than ASKING the universe FOR something, you are supposed to THANK the universe for what it has ALREADY given you. So I’m not supposed to say “I wish for an ass the shape of a lemon,” but rather “thank you for my lemon shaped ass… universe.” Life is so confusing. What can’t I just get what I want world!?

The Munch is going through a major wishing phase. So she is often suggests we make wishes together. She doesn’t really get the concept of keeping your wish a secret in order to make it come true, and I don’t really feel like enforcing it because I kinda want know what other people wish for.

My current wishes are no longer about the perfect body parts, the perfect life, or the perfect cheer. (SNL throwback fyi). If I’m going to wish anything it is going to be about my career. All these creative projects that I work on, and pray will one day come to fruition. Yet it turns out, that The Munch pretty much thinks my ambitions are absurd.

Munch: What did you wish for Mama?
Toni: I wish that the movie I just wrote would get made.
Munch: Really? That’s kind of a silly wish.
Toni: It is?
Munch: Yeah, like you don’t you wish for a unicorn that can fly or magical powers or something? I mean that’s what I wish for.
Toni: That sounds pretty good.
Munch: How about this, I will wish for the unicorn that can fly AND I will wish for your wish… I will just share my unicorn with you.

Munch and her best friend waiting for the stars to come out… to make NOT DUMB wishes involving obtaining magical powers

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