What Is Your First Memory?

It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that The Munch probably isn’t going to remember these first 3 years of her life.  What the eff?!  I want credit for this shit!!!!!!!! Thank god I write down every embarrassing story about her, and every great thing I do- so I can remind her until the end of time.  You are welcome Munch.

Even though we don’t specifically remember our babyhood and early childhood years, they still imprint our personalities, energy, and even cells.  It is kind of wild to think about all the life lessons we internalized, both good and bad, that as adults we will never be able to specifically recall.  Perhaps much of our humor, fears, happiness, or sadness all comes from this mysterious time that will forever be shrouded in a fog.

This made me wonder what my first memory was.  It was not clear to me, so I sat and thought, and thought, and then it came to me.

I was on the toilet.  I had just gone poop.  I was calling for my dad “Dad! Dad! Wipe me! I need you to wipe my bum!”  But he wasn’t coming.  I guess I wasn’t paying attention, and I slipped into the toilet.  My bum was submerged and my legs were pressed tightly against my chest.  I was stuck in the toilet with my ass in shit, and shit coming out of my ass.  “Dad! Dad! I am stuck!!!”

Finally my dad did come, but I think this story explains a lot about who I am now.