Although bribing people is an effective way to get people to do what you want, it may not always be the best strategy. Of course there are many different forms of bribery. Some good old fashion blackmail and psychological warfare. Or threatening to saw someone’s legs off and then breaking every bone in their body so they have to flop and slither their carcass across the floor to mobilize their pulped flesh. But there is also the more common approach of convincing someone that “if you do this for me, I will do this for you” which is how the 69 was first conceptualized.
I can see the seduction of bribery when dealing with your toddler. Once they start talking, it is customary to tell them what is going on because they are more person-like, and it is harder to just impose your will on them. Plus they can vocalize their opinions and have the capacity to be so annoying your left and right brain fuse together into one mega brain that suddenly fractures and splits into insanity.
So when you want them to do something and they say “no” in that emphatic, obnoxious, tone of voice, you are then in kind of a pickle. Especially if you are in front of other people and are trying to avoid a total meltdown. You want them to do what you want, but they are saying that they don’t want to – so now you either have to negotiate with them, or deal with the wrath of 2-year old.
Although it is tempting for me to bribe The Munch into succumbing to my way, I am tentative to do that because I want her to understand that being good to someone is a reward in and of itself. That doing good for goodness sake should be enough. I know that may sound corny, but it is true. There is an emotional reward for being empathetic or thoughtful, and trying to persuade her with promises of lollipops makes me feel like I am distracting her from a very real experience.
I really believe that even though Munch can be a total shit sometimes, she does understand the concept of compromise… I just have to be prepared to deal with her protests if the joy of my joy doesn’t quite satisfy her tyrannical needs.