Do you remember your first time? What you were wearing… who you were with… how you felt inside – that bubbling anticipation of not knowing what it was going to be like. I do. I was 21, stoned, with my boyfriend, and eating an insane about of cookie dough – which I continued to devour the entire time. Although I think I fell asleep for a few minutes in the middle.
We are talking about the same thing right? The first time you watched a conspiracy theory video.
Now I know you can think I am a nut job for entertaining this type of content. I am not saying conspiracy theories are God’s truth, but let me just give you something to contemplate. In Ancient Greece, the one thing that EVERY person had to participate in, whether you were a man, woman, child, or slave, was watching the plays. It was mandatory to attend the theater, because that was the strategy that got people emotionally invested in governmental decisions and war.
Something worth considering before you judge me MOM!
Back to my first time; I lost my “thought virginity” in 2001, with a VHS tape. YES! SO GOOD! The video was called “A Funny Thing Happened on The Way to the Moon,” and was about how the moon landings were faked for political gain and corporate corruption.
Now I am not saying the moon landing was faked… but I am also not saying it wasn’t.
I then got into Alex Jones, and entered into a void of conspiracy theories that only grew once Youtube came on the scene. “Zeitgeist,” “Loose Change,” “Room 237…” the list goes on and on and on and on. Subjects like our alien ancestors, The Bilderberg group, the ruling lizard elite, the Federal Reserve, the Amero, how we don’t actually have to pay taxes… I have seen them all.
Eventually I stopped watching these videos because I stopped smoking weed. But guess what I started doing again? Smoking weed and watching conspiracy theory videos – you’re welcome world.
So my brother and I got high over the weekend, and decided to enter into 2 conspiracy vortexes. The first was about how the movie “Back to The Future” predicted the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Keep an open mind okay!!!??
At first my brother was unimpressed with the video. We are both conspiracy theory aficionados, and I wanted him to be impressed by my selection. Yet the narrator kept repeating himself, and it felt pejorative to assume we needed information to be echoed so many times.
My Brother Laszlo: Yeah, yeah I know this already. The time on the clock is 9:11 upside down. The mall where the terrorist attack took place was called “The Twin Pines” mall. I’ve seen this stuff before.
I started to momentarily panic. Partly because I wanted my brother to be as blown away as I had been by the video, and partly because I was super high, and realizing I had NO COOKIES IN THE HOUSE!
As the video delved deeper, it divulged that not only did Robert Zemeckis’ “Back to the Future” predict 911, but it also implied that the official story is a fabrication. It goes on to say that Zemeckis’ new film “The Walk,” about Philippe Petit’s 1974 high wire walk across the twin towers, is “the reveal” about the 9/11 warning.
My Brother: Okay… I’ve never heard this before.
In the movie “Back to the Future,” Marty McFly gives Doc a letter warning him about the terrorist attack he will fall victim to. When doc asks, “what’s the meaning of this,” Marty replies, “You’ll find out in 30 years!” Just like how “The Walk” is being released exactly 30 years after “Back to the Future.” AND… now get this… When Marty McFly comes back from the future to talk to Doc, he is wearing the SAME outfit as Joseph Gorden-Levit in the “The Walk.”
What happened next I am not sure because I was thinking about making a second dinner…. but I do know there was some illuminati influence implied as well.
My Brother and Toni: The illuminati… yes… of course…
The video also explained that awareness of the screen, and touching the screen, is what exposes the wizard behind the curtain. Knowing about media manipulation is the main objective of these Zemeckis films. Supposedly, Zemeckis is suggesting that through unveiling the illusion of the screen, we will find the truth.
My Brother: Wait what? So how did Zemeckis know about 9/11? Did the aliens tell him? And who was this Philippe Petitte guy that the new movie “The Walk” is about? Why did he walk across the towers in the first place?
Toni: I don’t know? Maybe it is like you said earlier… that Philippe walked across the towers to inspire awe, wonder, and to get people to look up?
But at this point we were too freaked out to believe anything good.
My Brother: But what if it was some death ritual? Look at these skyscrapers… aren’t they reptilian? Maybe there was something more sinister going on, and he was suggesting that we worship these monoliths? I don’t want to worship a monolith. It is all so transhumanist! AHHHHHH!!
Toni: AHHHHH!! What does it all mean!!??
We were fully terrified. Because WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN!?
Then we decided to go into a “flat earth” quagmire. I mean we were high after all, and that is the perfect time to wonder if the world is actually flat.
Okay so I am not saying the world is flat… I’m just not saying that it isn’t.
The “flat earth” videos are pretty next level. We had to watch a few of them, and I still don’t really understand the argument. Some of the videos were deconstructing how satellites don’t really exist, which some how suggests flat earth. These videos had a SUPER complicated explanation about how satellites HAVE to be virtual and used science words. Then there were a lot of experiments using balloons, and how if you let one up in the air, it shows that there is actually no curve of the earth. Another video was going on about how the sun gets bigger the higher you get, and maybe the sun is actually only 40 miles away? I mean, I’ve never been to the sun so I don’t know!?
Toni: Are they basically suggesting that the world is in a 2 dimensional plane?
My Brother: Yeah, like how the UN map is a flat depiction of the globe. You can still sail from here to China in either direction, but you are not going around in a 3rd dimension. And I guess they say there is some glass dome on top of the earth that contains us.
We then looked at the map of flat earth.
Toni: Okay, but what if you just sailed a boat that way?? Wouldn’t that bring you to the edge?
My brother: Well, we have to watch another video to explain that part. But they say that beyond the ocean is a big wall of ice, and on the other side of the wall is where the aliens are.
Toni: Kinda like Game of Thrones?
My Brother: Yeah. And that is why the aliens got so pissed when we had nuclear explosions. Because they felt it. Even though we are imprisoned in this little zone, they are still impacted by our actions.
Toni: But what about all the pictures we have seen from space of the round earth?
My Brother: I don’t know? And what about all the astronauts who said they went to space?
Toni: Are they all just mind controlled? They never went up, but think they did because they were given too much acid at MK ultra?
My brother: I’m not saying they are mind-controlled. But I’m not saying they are not.
Toni: I’ve personally never explored space. I’ve just left it up to other people to investigate.
My Brother: Right, and then we just believe the information that we are given from their discoveries. And since they already did it, we don’t have to.
Toni: All the visual proof of the world being round is pictures and videos. And if you think about it, pictures and movies are what we use to trick ourselves into believing fake stories like “Star Wars.” At least momentarily we believe them so we can stay captivated by the narrative. That is why movies make us cry, laugh, whatever… because we suspend belief. We knowingly seek out fantasy through movies, but we also uncompromisingly believe things we see on video in the “news.” We use the same tool of manipulation for truth and for fiction.
My Brother: Exactly! It is just like the “Back to the Future” thing! We are controlled through media! Knowingly and unknowingly! Maybe we are living inside an M.C Escher painting. That is the Matrix… which begs the question, “do you feel betrayed?”
Toni: Exactly. Wait, but why would “they” want us to think we lived on a round earth?
My Brother: I don’t know. And who benefits from other people exploring for us, and telling us the “facts” of our “planet?”
Toni: I don’t know
My Brother: You know, thinking you know things to be true, kills the curiosity of finding out for yourself.
Toni: YES! Thinking you know – kills curiosity! THAT IS IT!
Okay yes all this is totally nuts, and yeah we were super high. But you know what? Obama refuses to meet with the “flat earth” advocates… so what does that mean? Maybe they are right? Or maybe they are totally crazy and the president is super busy and doesn’t have time for crazy conspiracies.
The reason why conspiracy theories interest me is because it is questioning the official story. There is an agenda to history, news, and media. It is a powerful tool that changes the way people think. But it is not that I believe every crazy video I see either. I would watch a conspiracy theory about how conspiracy theories are made by the government to distract us from the actual truth of what we are being told by the government. Totally! Maybe! Who knows! I just want to come from a place of curiosity.
Here they are for your enjoyment…