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Posts

  • Men are Not The Enemy

    Ugh!! These #meetoo stories of sexual assault are fucking me up! Every single woman I know has experienced some sort of sexual violation in her life – EVERY SINGLE ONE!

    With how many stories are being shared you’d think that all men are committing these acts of violence. Yet I feel like I know plenty of dudes that not perpetrators? Right guys? Maybe there are just some really prolific creepy dudes out there dispersing their rapey ways to a lot of victims? Perhaps for every ten stories women tell of some heinous behavior they all stem back to one inexhaustible dude. I want to believe the ratio isn’t as bad as it seems, and it’s more that shitty dudes are shitty to many women rather than most dudes are shitty.

    I wonder what it feels like to be a man right now? How a man that has sexually assaulted a woman- but is regretful- feels when he sees these posts. Do they ignite his empathy? Or inspire him to reach out to the woman he’s hurt and acknowledge his actions? How does a man react that has abused women, but lives in denial about it? Is he becoming more indignant and hateful? Do these women revealing their stories of pain open his eyes to the hurt he’s caused, or just make them seem like whiney bitches? Or what about the man that has never been creepy but is dealing with the burden of gender responsibility? Is he feeling defensive of his male counterparts, or horrified by their actions? I guess I understand that last guy the most because I do live with the guilt of being a white devil. But still, it can’t be easy to have a dick right now.

    I keep hearing arguments of people wanting to excuse the behavior of sexually deviant men through the lens of biology. This pervasive sentiment of, “Yeah it sucks, but that’s the way men are so what can we do about it?” attitude. This type of thinking is predicated on the assumption that because men have exterior genitals, bouncing around on their thighs all day begging to be burrowed in some hole, that they are going to act out sexually as a consequence. Because of this anatomical condition of “dick needing to be satisfied,” these men can’t control their sexual urges. So of course when your face looks like a shoe and you finally have some power to exploit, you’re going to try and fuck Gwyneth Paltrow. These things happen.

    I feel like there are a lot of holes in this logic. Now, I’m not a historian or anything, but I think men have a much greater predisposition to kill not rape. We didn’t evolve from a “raping and gathering” society… but a “HUNTING and gathering” one. Hunting is much more engrained in the male DNA then raping. For thousands of years men killed the shit out not only giant animals like Wooly Mammoths, but also that dude Zog from the neighboring tribe that looked at you funny from behind that rock and because you can’t speak to each other besides grunting – fuck that guy. You don’t know him. You’d spear the shit out of Zog and then continue with you day. There were no lawyers or murder trials in the early days of human history. Accountability for homicide didn’t happen until the ancient Greeks 2,500 years ago. Before that, you could kill anyone you wanted or deemed a threat, and then go home to your cave and eat supper.

    Yet I don’t here people saying in murder cases, “Well, men did evolve to kill, so they just got that blood thirst. Let him have a few sips.”

    NO!

    We have a pretty clear expectation that men should not kill people (unless of course you’re fighting some government provoked war to expand our Empire, or if you’re a police officer killing an unarmed black man. But let’s not get lost in semantics). There is a pretty obvious expectation to not kill each other; even though biologically killing is how we advanced into the species we are today.

    The other problem with justifying rape culture with the rational, “this is the way men are,” is the very wrong assumption that men like sex more than women. Nope. Not true at all. Just because my genitals are tucked in like a suitcase and not flopping around in front of me, doesn’t mean I enjoy or want sex any less than a man. In fact there were plenty of nights that I went out of my house with the sole purpose to find sex. Yet not one of those evenings consisted of me trying to cup a dude’s balls without his consent, or batting his dick around while he was trying to order a drink.

    Men aren’t rapey because they have testes, or because they like sex more. Men are rapey towards women because they view women as objects. They see women as pussies, not people. The patriarchy has insisted women are property to be taken care of by men for thousands of years. Just because we started working and voting a few decades ago unfortunately doesn’t take away that branding. When men treat women like sexual playthings invented purely for their own pleasure, (and care nothing of the pleasure or interest of the woman), it stems from a dehumanizing process that has been in place for millennia. But we can’t confuse social systems with biological imperatives. Just because it’s been this way, doesn’t mean it has to be. This conditioning is a consequence of learned behaviors, not inevitable ways of being. Just like men learned not to enslave people, they can also learn not to rape them. It’s a matter of shifting the consciousness.

    But men are also rapey towards other men and kids. Now what’s that all about?

    Now since I’ve never sexually assaulted a person, so I admit, there is a lot I don’t know about the impetus. But is seems to me that the other person NOT wanting your advances is part of the turn on. The fact that you’re doing something they don’t want, but you do want and you’re getting away with it, is part of the rush. That power you have over them fuels the desire, and is only enflamed by knowing you’re taking advantage of someone weaker.

    Again I think this has to do with socialization. Men have been in power for all of written human history. Power is a part of the masculine identity. Wanting power over another person is the foundation of most of the systems that rule us. Governments and capitalism are built on power over others. This is the social structure we’ve developed, so of course it’s going to get played out sexually. Sexuality is a reflection of culture, and in case you haven’t watched the news in your life, the world is a pretty ferocious place full of people seeking power over other people.

    The concept of wanting power over others is rooted in the structures that we’ve come to accept of how society functions. Until we develop a more cooperative system that is not top down, but rather a collective community of equal and shared responsibility, chances are there are going to be plenty of individuals mimicking the energy at play. If we live in a patriarchy run by a few wealthy men who suck up the majority of the earth’s resources for the benefit of the elite, we’re going have some rapers out there raping people. Yet when we open our minds to a new social structure that isn’t run by the tyrannically forces of the oligarchy and instead honors the need for global collaboration, then we’ll most likely have a hell of a lot less rapers.

    One of the most functional societies in the animal kingdom are ants – and they don’t have a boss bossing them around all day. There is no king, just a queen farting out babies. Ants don’t have a top down colony; they work together as equals and are the most efficient creatures on the planet because of it. When you have a “leader” as an organizational structure, that leader has to constantly re-enforce his power. The “alpha male” of the monkey species doesn’t just chill all day eating bananas. Nope. He has to remind everyone he is the fucking king all day by beating up scrawnier monkeys and trying to fuck all the ladies. That sounds exhausting. Most of the time spent being a leader is reminding everyone that you’re the fucking leader because the second anyone has a moment to think about it, they’re like, “hey this sucks, what the fuck?” Then the leader tries to kill or fuck someone and they’re like “fine whatever.” But the last time I checked, we’ve evolved quite a bit from the monkeys we came from, so maybe we could re-think this way of organizing ourselves. Just like we can change our minds and decide that we actually do like goat cheese, we have the power to change the way we think. So even the rapey dudes out there could become less rapey, if even not rapey at all.

    All men are not the enemy. There are lots of men that want the same changes in society that women do, because they too feel the insanity. There are even men that have fallen into the traps but are beginning to see the error of their ways, and are trying to get out. We got to pull those dudes up! If their arms are extended, grab one! We have to be flexible to the possibility that a lot of this horrible behavior they wish they hadn’t done too. If we are open to forgiving them, maybe they will be more open to apologizing and changing?

    But of course there are going to be some guys that burrow deeper into the cave of darkness trying desperately to hold onto a past paradigm. They will dig their heels in and believe that women deserved whatever tragedy had befallen them. They will continue to commit acts of misogyny and violence again and feel totally justified. They will champion men, and further denounce the rights of women – hence the every growing men’s right’s movement. And to those guys… ummm… hmmm… wow…. Lemme think… Jeeze… Good luck to you, and may the best man win.

  • It’s Too Stressful To Care

    For those of you that don’t live in the North East, New England has been having a glorious global warming fall. It’s been so unseasonably warm that I swam across the lake last week. That’s an hour-long swim that I took in late September – sponsored by Big Oil!

    Because I live in the soon to be Tundra of New Hampshire, I’ve been trying to appreciate all these uncharacteristic warm fall days. I push it out of my mind that this is all a consequence of greenhouse emissions being trapped in the atmosphere, because greenhouse gases sound kind of environmental no? How can they be bad if the word GREEN is used to describe them?

    On Sunday The Munch went to a birthday party, and I figured she would be so pumped full of sugar/GMO candy/cake that spending the afternoon at the playground wouldn’t be a bad idea. Munch climbed into the car with her bag full of candy, and I was emotionally prepared for her to eat the majority of it.

    Munch: Mom, we got all this chemical candy from the Piñata at the birthday party!
    Toni: I see that love.
    Munch: I tried one piece and I didn’t like it. It was too chemically. I’m not going to eat this chemical candy. It’s gross.

    Okay, first of all, I can’t believe my indoctrination has worked this well. My kid is so conditioned to believe that chemicals in your food are bad, that she wouldn’t even eat her Gummy Bears. I felt a deep pride that The Munch respects me enough to not only listen to my opinions, but also adopt my values as her own. Yet another part of me wanted her to eat all that chemical candy because fuck authority Munch!!!

    Once at the park, I saw some friends collected together at picnic blanket. I went and joined them, happy to experiencing this lovely day in this quaint community. The whole scene was really sweet. Children playing in the sun, mom’s watching their kids frolic while talking about G-spot orgasms. You know, the usual.

    We were having a good time is the point. Then somehow we started talking about the news and what was going on in Puerto Rico.

    Friend 1: I think that I need to be more informed about stuff.
    Friend 2: Ugh. I can’t. It’s too stressful. I only have so much empathy. It’s hard to have empathy. Things are always happening somewhere. It’s too much. That’s why I live here – in this bubble. I live in this bubble so I don’t have to care.

    Okay so here is where shit starts to get allllllll fucked up.

    Now I had a LOT of opinions about the above statement. A LOT! But I also didn’t know this person very well. It felt super awkward to disagree with someone so violently that I wasn’t even sure I’d met before – especially because we weren’t alone. It’s one thing to have a debate one on one, it’s another thing to school someone in public. And because I am such a people pleaser, it’s hard for me to knowingly make others uncomfortable. Yet at the same time, isn’t my being a people pleaser also about me pleasing myself because I don’t want to make myself uncomfortable because someone else is uncomfortable?

    The second more humiliating problem was just like this person felt it was too stressful to know about the world, I felt it was too stressful to provoke an argument about the 2,000,000,000 ways I disagreed with her. Just like she wanted to live in the bubble of not caring about the rest of the world’s suffering, I wanted to live in the bubble of not having to care about a middle class white woman that thinks it’s okay to not care about the world because you live in a fucking bubble.

    DO YOU SEE THE IRONY!!!!!

    As much as she didn’t want to have to care about the world, was as much as I didn’t want to have to care about her not caring about the world. Just like she wanted to enjoy her day not giving a shit about Puerto Rico, I wanted to enjoy my day not giving a shit about her not giving a shit!

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    There was also this feeling I had of total impotence. I had no idea how to tell her that she should care about people. I felt the same impotence for that situation that I feel about the trauma that is going on in the world. The same impotence she probably feels about the trauma of the world. There is so much violence, destruction, and gratuitous misery. It’s not like I don’t understand that feeling of not wanting to feel. Yet even though I don’t want to feel, I still feel I have to put myself in the face of feeling.

    Another one of my friends who shares my political beliefs was sitting next to me during this fateful moment. We both just got really quiet and looked down at the grass. My high functioning autism kicked in, and I refused to make eye contact. My social anxiety and fear of confrontation took over my physical form. As much as I wanted to scream, I also wanted to cry. The silence permeated the group. It was obvious that we didn’t agree, and my friend made the suggestion that you really don’t have to do that much to be a quasi-active person or be helpful to others. There were some vague agreements on that, and then the conversation shifted to food politics. If there is anything that white middle class people that live in a bubble can get behind, it’s organic farming.

    I left the park feeling both traumatized caught off guard by this chick’s ignorance. I didn’t have the energy to say anything. I didn’t know how to change her mind, or express my thoughts in a way that wasn’t aggressive. So I helplessly said nothing.

    This is the problem with humanity. We are sheep. Sheep that passively mill around, waiting to be devoured by the corporate and political systems we willingly allow to control us. Flocking about, unconcerned that the wolves lurking in the shadows are ones we’ve actively surrendered to. Yet expecting us to not be sheep may be unrealistic. Adaptation and sheepness have been a major part of our evolution. The fact that we are easily led around by the sheep dog we elect is why we were able to become the successful parasites on the earth that we see today. If humans weren’t sheep, there would be such constant dissent, bickering, questioning, and pontificating that we wouldn’t get much done. Because most of us are sheep, we can be easily organized and controlled. Being sheep is how we’ve been able have the so-called progress of the industrial revolution. There were plenty of sheep to work mindless jobs in factories. Our sheep ways have made it possible to for the few to control the many for thousands of years. We sheep have built pyramids, gone to war, and paved the way for John D. Rockefeller and Mark Zucerberg to have taken over our bodies and minds. It is our sheep ways that have been crucial for the invention of all modern technology and artificial intelligence so the robots will soon rule the planet.

    Yet if we accept our sheep ways, that doesn’t mean we have to be ignorant sheep. We can be knowing sheep- sheep that are interested in evolving. The ability to adapt to our environment was a crucial part of our evolution at one point. The ability to adapt our environment to us was the next crucial aspect of our evolution. Now we have the need to re-imagine our environment because at this is exact moment the earth is trying to shake us off the planet like a wet dog with fleas.

    All animals evolve. We are evolved animals. Now we have to become evolved humans.

    If you are an American, you are one of the privileged people on the planet. If you are white and middle class, you are even more privileged. You can’t have the rational that you were born into a bubble and therefor entitled to stay in that bubble. That bubble was built off the blood of others. That bubble is not clean. No one deserve’s to live in a bubble.

    I benefit off the imperialist and colonialist actions of the United States. Whether I want the government to be secretly destroying Yemen in a covert war or not, I still benefit off of those actions. Even if I don’t want poor black Americans to be incarcerated for absurd drug laws designed to imprison them and force generations into slave labor for the prison industrial complex, I still benefit from those actions. Even if I don’t want Puerto Rico to be drowning, I still benefit from our President refusing adequate financial aid.

    No matter what I want to be happening, all the despicable acts of our government still benefit me, and therefor it’s my goddamn responsibility to give a shit. Poverty, starvation, lack of access to clean water – this is not how life has to be. These atrocities are in direct correlation to political corruption and greed, not because it’s inevitable. The world has the resources for every human to live a descent life with access to the basic amenities. The fact that billions are denied this right is a choice. It is because of misdistribution and a deliberate withholding.

    In America, a large percentage of us can afford to learn and care about the well being of others. Most of us are not in survival mode, wondering if we will ever eat again. For those people, the 20% of American’s that live below the poverty line – I get it, you’re busy. You have yourself to worry about. That’s cool. You have the right to not tear your hair out because of global injustice. But for the rest of us, if you have time to be on Facebook, you have time to care and do shit for others.

    Here’s the lake and sunset that day I swam across… it’s a pretty bubble

  • The News is A Distraction From The News

    I miss the days when celebrity gossip was used to distract us from what was really going on in politics. Remember that? Those innocent times when you’d see this snarky post on Facebook that was like, “while you were busy paying attention to Kim Kardashian’s queef, Obama sent a drone attack to the Middle East.” Then you’d feel all dumb because you did care more about that queef, and thought you heard it from afar.

    Now, because Trump is so goddamn damn insane, the news is the distraction from the news. There is so much fucked up shit that he does, that Trump’s fucked up shit is distracting you from Trump’s other fucked up shit. It’s fucked up.

    I wanted to write about the news this week, but by the time I finish this sentence, Trump already did something else. I can’t keep up! No one can! And maybe that’s the point.

    I used to a conspiracy theorist that believed in the New World Order – that there was this secret group of 1%’ers ruling the planet with their lizard DNA. They were most likely aliens from the Palladien system, and would congregate in secret societies like the Bilderberg Group, or Bohemian Grove. Of course they bathed in the blood of goat fetuses, and were the puppeteers plucking the strings of humanity on the global violin of our so-called collective society. Borders were an illusion as insidious as the economy to maintain tribalism and further divide the humans to keep us from revolting from their Martian manipulation. Everyone thought this right?

    Now I think it’s pretty clear that no one is fucking in charge. Politicians are just actors making us think that someone is running the show, but guess what? We’re on a sinking ship with no captain. No one is in control; there is no grand plan. We are spinning around in a chaotic primordial mess where the government and private sector have merged together into a double helix that rivals the intentions of the Dark Star.

    I’M SO OPTMISTIC RIGHT NOW!

    Considering this, I wanted to share with you my favorite picture of The Munch and me.

    Here we are. Notice how I am about to serenely return my demon child to the cemetery from which I found her.

    May 11, 2017 • Current Events, Political Banter • Views: 731

  • Americans Anonymous Meeting

    “Hi. I’m Toni. And I’m an American.”

    “Hi Toni.”

    Doesn’t it feel like our country is in need of one giant AA meeting right now?? Americans Anonymous!!!

    Are we collectively sucking dick for our addictions? Are we metaphorically living under a bridge selling our souls to dealers? What’s happening!? We are better than this!!!!

    This current presidential election isn’t just about the two candidates we have to “choose from,” but also the mirror it has come to represent of our culture. It’s like we are in an Alice and Wonderland acid trip – staring into our reflection seeing an image of ourselves staring into our reflection seeing an image of ourselves staring into our reflection… forever… into eternity.

    The themes that have dominated the conversation of our political landscape – racism, sexism, xenophobia, corruption, corporate greed, political lies, voter disenfranchisement, questioning of democracy, rape – are all microcosms of the underbelly of this country. Even though it’s painful to admit this, at least we now get the opportunity to roll over of on our backs and expose ourselves… belly in the air, genitals blowing in the wind.

    Currently we have 4 psychological wars going on within our borders; gender wars, race wars, class wars, and religious wars.

    What’s with all the civil wars! I don’t want this! If shit goes down lefty liberals like me are pretty much screwed. We don’t have guns! I can’t fight anyone with my witty feminist banter or new age rhetoric about how we are all connected through the quantum field. The astral plane of existence where I eat gogi berries with Ram Das won’t save me from an AK47!

    We are creating false enemies with each other, and this keeps us distracted. The more we focus on attacking each other, the less we focus on how corporations are screwing us… with NO LUBE!

    When we are divided, we are not fighting for our collective rights or seizing corporate America. We are instead allowing earth’s precious resources to be capitalized by big business as we stand around yelling at each other.

    Part of our complexity is that because we are so diverse in America, there are going to be more opinions, ways of life, and perspectives. Yet I think we are going about things all wrong. Instead of focusing on the issues we supposedly care about, we instead direct our attention to hating everyone. If we were purely thinking about the issues, we would realize that there are ways we could be more tactical.

    Lets take for example pro-life people, who often see themselves as one issues voters. They want to keep unwanted fetuses alive. What would be a good solution to that vision? Get together with gay men who want to adopt babies! Both groups have the same interest, and maybe together they could support pregnant women to go through the trauma of pregnancy, birth, and giving your kid up. United they would be able to give more to these women in a real way! If pro-life people we actually pro all life, and not anti gay, they could really work together!

    There are so many potential strategic alliances that we don’t even think of! Maybe the Black Lives Matter leaders should be a part of the NRA and push more “open carry” laws. Then if all black people could just openly carry their guns, they would get shot less! Everybody wins!

    Think of all these men who hate women, troll them on the Internet, and believe they are unfit to be president. Sounds like those dudes need to get laid! So let’s get them together with feminists who are fighting for legalizing prostitution so it is safer for women to practice sex work. These men will then blow their loads more often, redirect their testosterone, and sex workers could be protected under the law.

    Or what about the people who want to deport all the undocumented people in this country, and build giant walls at our borders. They blame immigrants for “taking our jobs,” and “destroying the country.” Well, the undocumented workers aren’t in a great position either. The conglomerates that hire them exploit them exactly because of their “illegal” status. So what’s the solution? Bring these two groups together to force big companies to bring industry back to America rather than outsourcing it to other countries where their people work in slave like conditions. Then there would be more jobs for Americans, and the undocumented workers could get their damn documents because we would need the extra hands to re-build the infrastructure.

    If we actually collaborated over the issues we cared about, we would be so effective! Right wing men want less government, and left wing women want less government too… in their uteruses! If Germany can make a train that creates zero emissions and farts out water then don’t you think this country can’t get its head of its ass and not destroy the planet?

    We live in a place where people very often vote against their own interests. There are poor whites that think voting for Trump is their best option, ignoring the fact that his polices and tax proposals are not in their favor. His plan for health care is to pay your own damn health bills! Good one Donald! You get it! Then there rich whites who would benefit from Trump’s policies and tax plans that would NEVER vote for him. What interesting psychologies these people have! They need to have tea and talk about why they vote against their own interests and what visions they are trying to preserve!

    Is what we want for this country really that different if we take away the sexism, racism, and extreme wealth inequality? Okay fine maybe there are Christian fundamentalists who are actively waiting for Armageddon and are looking forward to the rest of us burning in hell – but if we were all in hell together, it kinda sounds like an okay party?

    In the off chance you aren’t my Facebook friend and haven’t seen this gem 🙂

    November 3, 2016 • Current Events, Environmental Impact, Political Banter • Views: 858

  • A White Chick’s Thoughts on the Police State, Steroids, and The Deception of the American Dream

    Have you ever taken an information detox? You know, like when you only juice the news? I am just emerging from mine, and even though I feel lighter without the burden of digesting world events, I also know I will gain all the weight back as soon as I start eating up content again.

    For an entire month I was (gasp) too busy to look at Facebook. I know… a tragedy almost too tragic to tell. This meant my lifeline to the outside world was broken. Without my newsfeed, there was no one are around to feed me news. When I finally sat down to catch up on what I’ve been missing I was so disturbed that my face actually buffered.

    I have a theory about the police force in America. I think there is a HUGE population of officers who take steroids.

    The last time I was in New York City, I was looking at the body types of the cops. They all look like super heroes in the 3rd installment of their movie franchise. I don’t think it is possible for people who work at least 9 hours a day at a job to also have the time to be at the gym long enough to get that muscular.

    Yes I know fitness is part of the criteria of being a cop, but in order to get as fit as a LOT of the police out there, you have to literally spend HOURS every day lifting and training. There is almost no way they have the time to achieve those bodies naturally.

    Just like we test athletes for steroids, we need to test policemen as well!!!!! There is a hell of a lot MORE at stake then some records being broken.

    “Roid rage” is a real thing. Steroids majorly impact your psychology – causing nervousness, mood swings, extreme irritability, delusions, hostility, aggression… When I watch videos of police brutality/ MURDERS, it’s like these guys are possessed!!!

    Yes racism is for SURE a factor in the rampant problems within the police force, but I would argue that steroids are enflaming the violence. There is currently no standardized testing for cops. I think every police officer that’s involved in an unwarranted ferocious attack should IMMEDIATELY be tested – as should their entire department. Drug use does not exist in a vacuum. Just like in sports teams, usually MANY people are using together. A culture is created where it’s not only accepted, but you are WEAK if you don’t.

    Also, why the hell do traffic cops need guns? Okay fine you can have a Taser just in case, but I really don’t think if your main objective is to pull people over for speeding or rolling through a stop sign, you also need a gun to shoot people in the head. Not every police officer needs a gun to do their job. I would like to see the stats of how many policemen are murdered because of traffic stops vs. how many citizens are UNJUSTLY murdered because of driving with a “wide nose.”

    The question most rational people are asking themselves is; what do we do about this very obvious pandemic?

    I don’t think people are being consciously complacent. I see that many Americans deeply care about this gross inequality. Yet at the same time, we are allowing it to happen because – it KEEPS HAPPENING! There is UNDENIABLE EVIDENCE of these events occurring – videos that tell the story of a crime – yet cops are STILL getting off, aren’t persecuted by the law, and often receive massive pensions if they leave the force.

    There seems to be this disconnect between what we know to be VERY WRONG, and not knowing how to take action. I think this is partly because as a society, modern Americans have very little context when it comes to genuine rebellion or dissent. We have been protected for many years from the fears that a huge population of the world deals with daily. There is no war outside our front doors. We are not risking our lives to go to school. America is not perfect by any means, but it’s a hell of a lot safer than a country that actually experiences drone attacks.

    We live in a first world bubble of potential and opportunity. Although the promise of the American dream may have an idealistic value to the psyche of our country, it’s also an extremely dangerous mentality to believe in.

    In order for a population of people to be controlled, they have to be divided. Because American has such vast diversity, both with race, culture, economics, and religion, we are less united. Even if we share a similar social justice belief system, there is a vast range of the kinds of people involved in any movement, and they have very different levels sacrifice.

    If you look at the youth movement in Palestine, they are mostly coming from a very similar frame of reference. They are all equally oppressed, and feel their inequality equally amongst themselves. There is a community in dissent, because they all mostly have the same risk. They see no future in their country, so risking their lives to fight for one seems logical. The promise of zero opportunity frees them from holding back. They are literally fighting against injustice with rocks and make shift weapons because they have nothing to lose.

    Yet here in America, there is this looming promise of opportunity. It’s scary to sacrifice everything because what if you miss out? The diversity of our experience of being Americans keeps us divided. The hope of achieving the “American Dream” keeps us from really going balls to the wall in fighting a system we KNOW is corrupt. Even if you live in a poor community that is constantly patrolled, there is still this lingering hope that you can get out. You could be one of the few exceptions, and fit yourself into a different potential future if you just kept quite and kept working.

    So this leaves us in a philosophical conundrum. We have all the information to know how dangerous and unjust the corrupt justice system is; yet we are passive observers to it. Although words are crucial when it comes to paradigm shifts, and many people are speaking out, there is something more needs to be done with our actions.

    There are all these inspiring speeches going around with people talking about how there is no “race,” except for the “human race.” Race is a complete social construct that was created by Europeans to oppress and objectify Africans when they were being colonized. There aren’t different races, just different physical attributes. But “race” is still very alive in our imaginations and to pretend that it hasn’t embedded in our culture isn’t working. Being aware of our current paradigm of race is the first step to restructuring its significance – especially because of the danger with the ignorant identification with those of your same race.

    When Philando Castille was brutally murdered while reaching for his gun permit, where was the outrage from the NRA????!!!!!!!! This is like their thing… isn’t it??!! Why aren’t they speaking out about this issue and using this story to further their cause. Because they are all a bunch of white dudes who think they can only identify with white gun owners?!

    The assumption that race is the defining indicator of identification is so archaic. If I were in a room with a 20 white women who all came from a similar socio-economic background, all attended private school like I did, all went to college, and all had 6 year old daughters, I would still identify more with the Asian man in the corner making a mandala out of neon sand and talking about his chakras. My tribe of people are NOT white women, but rather anyone who is counter culture and challenging convention. Those people that want to stand out from the status quo while talking sincerely about energy centers, past life regressions, and conspiracy theories they got tattooed onto their back.

    This pretty pretty much sums up my feelings about all this… Sad day to think NWA’s “Fuck the Police” is just as relevant now as it was 18 years ago 🙁

    munch NWA

    July 14, 2016 • Current Events, Political Banter • Views: 1264

  • The Bernie Hillary Feminist Love Triangle

    I am a proud feminist. I celebrate the sacred feminine every full moon with a menses ritual. I say things like “smash the patriarchy” non-ironically at dinner parties. I named my dog after Simone De Beauvoir. And I’m pretty sure if you typed in the word “vagina” in the search engine of this blog – 4 to 6 million posts would come up.

    But just because I’m a feminist, doesn’t mean that I am going to blindly support Hillary for president.

    I want to. Oh goddess do I want do I want to. Sweet Mother Gaia would that be divine. But as much as my uterus craves more women in positions of power, that doesn’t mean I can only think with my ovaries.

    Hillary Clinton, Grandmother Moon bless her, is unfortunately a compromised individual. Anyone who WANTS to be president is.

    Hillary has wanted to be president for a long time. At least for 8 years – but I think you and I both know this ambition dates longer than that. Maybe Hillary has wanted to be president for 20 years, or even 30. What that means is that much of her political policy has been dictated with this nagging concept in the back of her mind. “How will this decision impact the possibility of me one day being elected president?”

    As a consequence of this aspiration, Hillary has been pandering to the center. She hasn’t been particularly progressive because she has been too calculated in her decision-making. If you look at her record she has promoted Fracking, supported the Wall Street bail out, supported the invasion in Iraq, supported the Patriot Act, supports the death penalty, supported the defense marriage act, she’s in bed with Monsanto, has a Wall Street funded Super PAC, and is part of the 1%.

    She’s been playing the game of politics.

    I am not sure I believe her choices are a reflection of her actual morality, but rather a desire to rise through the ranks of power. From a personal perspective I can say, “you go girl,” because she has become one of the most powerful women in the world. But that doesn’t mean that I trust her.

    Yes Hillary has faced challenges that her male counterparts have not. Yes she has been criticized by the media, and the public, in ways that are exclusive to the fact that she has the wrong genitals. Yes there is a vast discrepancy when it comes to men and women in politics. YES TO ALL THAT! YES THAT NEEDS TO CHANGE!

    But if you look at Hillary’s political history, being a woman hasn’t hurt her. It’s helped her. Her status quo run of the mill policies wouldn’t stand out of if she were a man. The only reason why a true leftist would even CONSIDER her as candidate is because she is a woman.

    I don’t blame Hillary for being strategic throughout her career. She had no other choice. I understand that completely. Yet I don’t think electing her just to prove to the world that we can have a woman president is that meaningful. It’s a superficial statement. It wouldn’t truly impact the role of woman in American society. It’s not like just because we had a black president suddenly racism disappeared. There have been rampant acts of racism that are beyond archaic since Obama has been elected. It’s only brought it to the forefront. Sure it’s great that kids can now see a black president, or little girls could experience a woman president. But figureheads and puppets don’t change the deep systemic racism and sexism that exist in the world.

    Obama or Hillary can’t solve these social issues because they had to sacrifice too much of their own political beliefs to get the position they are in. Obama had to prove that he wasn’t “too black” to be president just like Hillary has to prove she isn’t “too feminine.” If we lived in a true democracy it would be possible to be an honest politician. But we don’t. We live in a corporatetocracy. Therefore ANYONE who makes it up that ladder did so because of back door deals to satisfy the agenda of big banks and big business.

    That is why Plato fantasized about the idea of the “philosopher king.” In his worldview, the philosopher, the one who values questioning over personal power, is the only person fit to be king. They are the only ones who can’t be corrupted. Yet the issue is that no philosopher would ever want to be king.

    Anyone who has the goal of being president of the United States of America has done some very dirty transactions to get to that position. EVERYONE.

    So this brings us to Bernie Sanders. Now I’m not saying that Bernie is perfect, or that I agree with everything that comes out of his mouth. But I’m pretty sure Bernie is just as surprised as everyone else by how close he is to being nominated.

    Because Bernie hasn’t spent his entire political career with the goal to one day be president, he has spoken out in a much more progressive and potentially honest way. Bernie may not be the perfect candidate, but what he has done is radically changed the conversation. He is a rebellion against Wall Street. He is the continuation of the Occupy movement. He’s trying to dismantle the very banking system that supports Hillary. He’s the only candidate that has the freedom to say, “the 1% are fucking us” because he is not in their back pocket.

    Hillary’s campaign is supported by big donations from rich people. Bernie is instead being supported by small donations from poor people.

    Bernie will inevitably have more political integrity because he is beholden to the people, not the corporations.

    Of course the congress and senate are going to cock block anyone who tries to enact truly progressive political progress, but that is the direction our country needs to be heading. Not only socially, but environmentally, and financially. The current corruption is too dangerous. Wall Street is too dangerous. This model of profit over people and the planet is KILLING US ALL.

    So as much as my vagina wants a woman president, my brain wants someone who is more interested in challenging the system than catering to it.

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    February 4, 2016 • Current Events, Political Banter • Views: 1711

  • Why Donald Trump Will Never Be President

    There is no way Donald Trump is going to be president. I am willing to bet my left labia on it. Not the right, because I’m a liberal.

    I truly believe the reason why Donald Trump is currently getting so much attention, and may even become the republican nominee, is because he is a pawn to placate the extreme right. There have been some pretty major social shifts in the Obama administration, and even though it wasn’t the “change” a hyper progressive conspiracy theorist like me would have wanted to see (ie a total dismantling of Wall Street replaced by a globally organized gift economy predicated on the trading of solely biodynamic goods and services) there still have been some pretty major developments.

    The thing about American politics is that people are excessively passionate about issues that aren’t political. Everyone has an opinion about abortion rights and gay marriage, but pretty sure most people don’t have much to say about the Federal Reserve’s impact on our banking system. The boring details of our government and how sanctions in Iran actually affect you are often not discussed. It is not like the national conversation centers around the truth that if everyone was deeply involved in their local political structure, they could potentially enact drastic national policy. That would be too complicated! So instead we fight about anal sex and the harvesting of baby parts because EVERYONE has something to say about that.

    The extreme right is angry, confused, and afraid. The social developments are intimidating, and that makes them feel insecure. When people feel backed into a corner and threatened – they act out. It is a strategy to protect oneself and preserve whatever it is they’re holding onto. The extreme right needs to feel like the government is still on their side in order for the illusion of democracy to hold true.

    I say illusion because we don’t live in a state ruled by the people – corporations and corporate interests govern us. It’s beyond oligarchy. We live in a “corporatetocracy.” Yet if we were to admit this, it would undermine the US global rhetoric that we invade other countries to spread democracy like a venereal disease – when our real motive is to pillage their resources and employ our companies.

    America isn’t a country – it’s a business. And let me tell you, the CEO’s of brand USA know that Donald Trump would be bad advertising. The ruling lizard elite (or whoever, no judgment here) are all well aware that in order for the US to continue it’s covert imperialism, we have to keep the brand intact.

    Donald Trump serves the agenda of pacifying the extreme right, but he would be an awful product ambassador for this country. The New World Order knows this! The US needs to seduce the global community in order to manipulate them into buying our merchandise. The exportation of Hollywood, fashion, technology, “freedom,” “progress,” all capture the imagination of those that want to believe in the land of opportunity. The true leaders of this country know our actual dependency on immigrants, yet they will allow Trump to publically shame them just to satisfy the stupidity of the citizens. It’s all a show.

    Donald Trump can’t be president because in the global stratosphere he is so obviously a joke. But America needs his voice right now because he does contribute to the schizophrenic identity of the American people. On the one hand we are one of the most socially tolerant countries on the planet, and on the other, we are just as archaic as Saudi Arabia. There are still very conservative old world thinkers in this country, and they are mixed up in a place where Caitlyn Jenner wins a woman of the year award. This schism is hard to mend because social and religious beliefs are way more engrained than political understanding.

    This election is the manifestation of the current cultural division in this country, and how emotionally bipolar we are as a nation. If we are looking at a Trump vs Clinton showdown, then I think it is pretty clear that what we are watching is not our votes at work, but our feelings at play. The more authentic representatives of the right and left are swept away like insignificant pests because they don’t fan the flame of the display. Trump and Clinton are the stars because their narrative serves the game and will keep people distracted from asking the real questions – like seriously, who are the lizard elite and what do they want!?

    (PS Even though I don’t fear Trump in the White house, that doesn’t mean his speech hate crimes and racist rhetoric – which the media has legitimized – isn’t detrimental).

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    December 7, 2015 • Current Events, Political Banter • Views: 1503

  • Smoking Pot and Watching 1970’s Sci-Fi With My Brother

    On the fateful date of September 8th I received a text message from my brother that requested we watch the movie “Zardoz” together. And I quote, “Don’t look it up on Wikipedia. It has to be seen to be believed. I feel in my Hungarian heart that we need to experience this movie. It will be like when I introduced you to marijuana, because I bet you will start leading seminars on it.”

    When a sibling makes a request of another sibling with this magnitude of importance, the appeal must be granted. This is the duty of the sibling bond. When one sibling insists the other watch 1970’s science fiction, the other sibling MUST comply. It is the only way.

    The next order of importance was when this screening should take place. According to my brother, “one cannot watch Zardoz under times of stress,” so we had to plan it perfectly. This event could not be rushed, nor could it be put off for too long. I then received a text that read, “I want it to be sheer insane joy for you, so my gut tells me we should do the screening to celebrate the autumnal equinox.” So I of course honored my brother’s pagan instincts, and we gathered on Sunday evening to watch Zardoz.

    At this point you might be wondering to yourself, “Toni, what the dick is Zardoz?” Let me tell you, I too had that same question! Yet since I had sworn off any Wikipedia interference, my knowledge of Zardoz was probably as vast as yours. Meaning, I had no fucking clue what Zardoz was.

    Upon my brother’s arrival, we debated whether or not smoking weed was a good ritual to introduce us to this sacred ceremony.

    My Brother: Maybe we don’t do the weed, because Zardoz is a trip in and of itself.

    Again, I complied, since my brother is the Zardoz aficionado. We started the movie and the first image was a man’s floating head cloaked in a strange cloth hat. As his decapitated head drifted across the screen, I realized that his beard and mustache had been drawn on his face with what seemed to be… a Bic pen.

    Toni: I think we are going to have to smoke some pot after all.

    This was the first “pause” of many that was to take place during the viewing of Zardoz. We momentarily stopped the movie and each took a hit of weed. Since we are both sensitive souls, we had to be careful not to smoke too much, which would surely sour the Zardoz. Even though you have to be high to watch Zardoz, you don’t want to be too high.

    The next 105 minutes of the movie extended to about 200 minutes because we had to pause and discuss so many things. I mean, you can’t get high and watch post-apocalyptic sci-fi from 40 YEARS AGO and not have a LOT to deliberate over.

    I can’t say that I totally know what was going on the ENTIRE time of that movie, but this is the general gist of what we discussed.

    The movie is essentially about over population and the destruction of the planet through mindless breeding and overconsumption of resources. My brother and I both agreed this message is just as relevant today as it was in 1974. In the first shot of the movie with the floating head, said head talks directly to the audience – implying that you too, the watcher, are part of the problem. So don’t watch this movie feeling exempt.

    Once we were about 3 minutes into Zardoz, I realized that I had missed a line of dialogue, but could not rewind the movie with the remote I had on my phone. I am not that good at Apple TV, and don’t actually know how to rewind, only pause. This led us to the philosophical realization that this moment of not being able to rewind the movie was just like life. We can’t go backwards in time, we can only pause something to slow down the present. The more present you are, the more you can delay the progression of a fast forward future.

    We then sat and looked at the paused picture for about 3- 6 minutes. A floating head stared back at us. Oh – not the same floating head mind you…. A different one. This one was made of stone. I mean, what kind of movie would Zardoz be with just ONE floating head.

    We watched about 4 more consecutive minutes, then had to pause it again. This time was because we had to read the writing on the wall. Literally. The main character was in a room, and behind him, written on the wall, was writing. It read, “in this secret room from the past, I seek the future.”

    It was at this moment that my brother and I realized that maybe Zardoz is as profound as Stanley Kubrick’s “The Shining.” After all, John Boorman wrote, directed, and produced the movie, so everything we were seeing was EXACTLY his vision. Boorman wasn’t compromising on anything. This was the movie he wanted us to see. When people in the boardroom asked John, “Does the main character Zed played by Sean Connery HAVE to wear underwear and knee high boots as a costume?” Boorman said, “Hell yes he does. You are going to look at Sean Connery in red panties and hooker boots the ENTIRE film, and you are going to like it.”

    The point is that Boorman vetted every decision in the making of Zarodoz. So my brother and I figured we could make an entire documentary breaking down all the political, social, and Meta commentary just like in that documentary “Room 237.” Even though I was only 7 minutes in, I knew Zardoz was that deep. As my brother said, “Boorman is sucking the Kubrick marrow.”

    About 13 minutes in, we had to pause yet again because my brother got inspired. He then went on a 17-minute diatribe about the current geo political landscape, the future of secret societies, the potential of a transparent government, yet somehow then brought it all back to an analysis of self and his own personal evolution.

    It was pretty impressive.

    We then got really into the narrative of the movie and talked less. The basic lesson I learned was that the global elite might very likely sequester themselves from poverty and extreme environmental catastrophes. They will quarantine themselves in a fabricated utopia, where they fancy themselves the custodians of high culture. They will then become immortal, because that’s what rich people do.

    Yet this landscape will forever be fundamentally flawed, because human nature is. Despite having eternity, their minds will still be confined. The common assumption in life is that our bodies are limited, and our minds are boundless. But Zardoz reminds us how it is our bodies that are actually limitless, and our minds limited.

    Stress is what ages us. It is the mind that kills us. The body is immortal and could defy all physics if only the mind could conceive it. As the protagonist played by Sean Connery said, “I see nothing inside except my own perplexity. Knowledge isn’t enough.”

    Zardoz also planted the seed that maybe all war is simply entertainment for the rich. They don’t see the people fighting as actual people, but a subspecies of lower importance. Much how we see animals. We avoid projecting our human feelings onto them, for it’s just a bull for Christ’s sake. It doesn’t feel how I feel, so let’s enjoy watching it fight till the death.

    The other lesson of Zardoz is how when you have nothing but time, time means nothing. Yet the boredom will pollute you.

    When my brother left that night he said to me, “you are probably thinking ‘why Zardoz, why now?” And he was right. I was thinking that, and I bet you are too!

    zardoz

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    September 21, 2015 • Birth • Views: 3868

  • The Problem With Modern Media

    When I read a story in the mainstream media, I immediately question its validity. News sources are dependent on corporate backing to make a profit, so they’re unquestionably compromised. It doesn’t make business sense to expose the companies that write your paychecks. We know this, which is why the invention of the Internet was such an exciting prospect. Suddenly there was this prospect that we could get information that would circumvent the CEOs who probably feast on baby blood in the night. You know, to stay young and all.

    But the problem with the blogosphere is the main way to make money is by getting a sponsorship from some business… so what the dick? I get approached all the time to blog about some product as if I actually felt compelled to write about a vegetable slicer – which if you need one btw, the “Ultimate Slice Fest” is the one to buy!

    You could be reading something you think is authentic – like someone going on and on about how dope the iWatch is, and insisting it won’t ruin your life or ability to connect to anyone or anything – but they are in truth just a marketing ploy for Apple.

    When writers are not getting paid for their work, then they tend to jump on the bandwagons of viral stories so they can get for clicks, eyeballs, and looksies. Every story becomes like a feeding frenzy of vultures. For example, when the Rachel Dolezal story broke, everyone pounced on it, ripping this human apart, rather than approaching the subject with curiosity and respect.

    Stories become more about tearing people to shreds rather than reporting information. In order to get attention, writers claw over each other and into the eyes of their subjects just to be seen. The amount of “likes” and “shares” supersede the need for humanity. People embark into a culture of shame just to make a name for themselves. Tom Brady should kill himself because he doesn’t like to throw footballs that have air in them. Stuff like that. Just as quickly as we build people up, we will push them off the pedestal into a mound of dog poop.

    When the Internet first started blossoming, I had this assumption that with the democratization of media, there would be less corruption in business and politics. I assumed that conspiracy theories would no longer be seen as fringe media, but viable alternative perspectives of the obvious dishonesty of those in power.

    Maybe there was a moment when the lizard elite were like, “holy fuck, we can’t hide our creepy agenda anymore because now everyone knows about our secret societies and demonic ways.” There were huge movements built around taking down government lies. Endless websites exposing the Federal Reserve, 9/11, chem trails, the moon landing…. Yet now there are TOO many theories out there, and the deluge dilutes the potency of them.

    I am sure the truth is out there, but it’s buried under a mass of bologna insisting aliens rule the planet, the moon doesn’t exist, and Denver National airport is actually hell on earth. On second thought, maybe all that is accurate.

    Awww the lizard elite are kinda cute!

    reptilian elite

    August 3, 2015 • Current Events, Musings • Views: 1275