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My Child is a Shaman

We all have an inner voice.  Mine perhaps is more outer than most, but my belly button is an innie so it all evens out.  Unless you have hyper-conditioned your mind to speak only affirmations, chances are your internal dialogue is quite critical.  Mine is telling me, “that was a stupid sentence, and you are always wordy, and write too many run-ons, and your skin is looking grey, and your hair is stringy, and there you go with those run-on sentences again you big poopy face dumb-dumb.”

Some people are more sadistic to themselves then others.  Self-abuse is never okay because it can make you go blind, or grow hair on your palms.  At least that is what I was told.  I have a friend who is a lovely talented angel from another dimension of perfection, but she is always ripping herself apart – which is gross and makes stains.  The story she tells herself of her life does not honor her ability or accomplishments.

Today she was lying on my bathroom floor, going down a spiral of negativity, and feeling really down.

Toni: “Munch, should we go check on Bridget to see if she is okay?”

Munch: “Okay… Mamma she is on the floor!”

Toni: “I know Munch!”

Munch: “Is she okay? Is she feeling sick?”

Toni: “Yes Munch, she is feeling sick.”

Munch: “She is sooo sick and she is on the floor?  What’s the matter with her?”

Toni: “I don’t know Munch… what do you think she is sick with?”

Munch: “Ummmm I think she is sick in her mouth.”

Isn’t that so insightful?  I have never complained about my mouth being sick, and really don’t think The Munch was reenacting some ailment she has witnessed.  She came up with that out of her own intuition.  And I think she is completely right.  We too often tell ourselves that we aren’t good enough.  The inner-dialogue harshly condemns more than it expresses positivity and self-love.

The Munch is a wise sage.  A shaman if you will… because maybe we are all a little sick in our mouths.

(Look! Munch did our make-up! Don’ we look amazing!?”



6 Responses to My Child is a Shaman

  1. Laszlo says:

    I’m with you. I have a negative monolog that travels in the past and the future, and various parts of the planet. In life, I tell others not to be the wet blanket on themselves, but often, I am tricking my own self into wet-blanket status.

    I say critique the critic. Never allow one’s self to be stuck with someone blowing air in the form of words that drips with fear and is a mere monument to animality. Rather, write a reasoned defense. The inner shitter of one’s own self may not have a sustainable thesis upon which their case would rest.

  2. holly says:

    Children and B,

    Stop shitting on yourselves. Stop shitting on yourselves right now and build, one step at a time.

  3. elizabeth says:

    here in eugene, people pay shamans big money for that kind of work.

  4. elizabeth says:

    see if you can get her to incorporate an eagle feather or something and she can put herself through college

  5. Laszlo says:

    Holly (Mama), your two children will do this one step at a time. There’s a lot of negativity out there, both from inside and out, that one has to reckon with everyday, but you are right to tell us “step by step.”

  6. Addy says:

    Me love Munch chi chi!!!! Obvi a makeup artist as well….we’ve heard from all the beauty queens…a little gloss and eyelash darkening (can’t spell mascerra) do wonders for the community…all I know: we aren’t born with unkind voices and patterns of such are not the true root, more like bamboo or ivy that is difficult to remove and potentially life threatening…choking…hey give Bridget the hemlock!

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