Social etiquette is one of those things that may censor us from being “real,” but also makes you less of tool.  If you tell people everything that is on your mind, you might actually come off as pretty annoying.  I mean it is one thing when you know a person and already have love for them, but it is another when a stranger insists on telling you what they think.  And as a parent, you come across a lot of other parents who will just let you know their opinion regardless of if you wanted it.

The other day The Munch and I went to this organic fish and chips place because of course we did.  As we were waiting for the food, the guy who owned the cafe started chatting with us.  Now even though I usually don’t take anyone wearing tie-dye seriously, he seemed nice enough and I was pretty excited for our fries.

Tie-Dye Guy: I have a daughter about her age too? What is she 3? 4?

Toni: Yeah she is 3! Does your little girl go to school?

Tie-Dye Guy: No she is homeschooled.  We are not into the whole school thing.

Toni: Oh, I hear you. This one goes to a Waldorff school.

Tie-Dye Guy: Oh those are the absolute worst.  I would never send my kid there.  I mean, school is already oppressive and tyrannical, but Waldorff takes it to a new level with their dogma hidden behind their anti-dogmatic messaging.  My wife’s father went to a Waldorff school and really despised his experience.  He said he would never pay for his granddaughter’s education if she were going to Waldorff.  But any way, for now the homeschooling is so much better, and super easy too.  My daughter is way beyond any of the kids her age who go to school.  She can already count to 80, and knows her phone number and address. She is much smarter than her peers – that is for sure.

Toni: But who is home with your daughter homeschooling her if you are here at the cafe?

Tie-Dye Guy: Oh my wife is.  She is with her all the time.  They go everywhere together.  She is like her little buddy.  She takes her to board meetings and everything.

Toni:  Sounds easy for your wife.

First of all, he is not even the one doing the homeschooling so how can he be talking about how amazing it is?  I mean sure, maybe his wife enjoys every minute with her daughter, or maybe it can be really hard sometimes because toddlers are not always perfect.  Caring for someone else takes a lot of exertion, and doesn’t leave a lot of time to do things for yourself.  I am not saying homeschooling can’t be fan-fucking-tastic, but even the most agreeable children still take effort.  I just felt it was a little condescending of him, the one not doing the homeschooling, to be representing it like it was the easiest thing ever.

And am I crazy or did I just tell him I sent my kid to a Waldroff school 20 seconds before he berated it.  Now I am not saying I have completely drunk the Kool-Aid my self, but he doesn’t know that!? Who just rips apart someone’s life like that and acts like I should be grateful for his wisdom?  Okay fine, maybe The Munch can’t count to 80, but she is smart enough to know that this guy was a total douche.