Kids are assholes.  They bully each other, they gang up on the weak to taunt and torment them, they have no filter, and say the cruelest truths.  They are a bunch of little dicks and most people accept it because “kids will be kids.”

I was not a mean kid, and I don’t have any traumas where kids were excessively nasty to me, but I have witnessed some pretty cruel behavior.  Interfering in such situations is difficult because although you want to help, you also don’t want the negativity to be transferred on to you.  I have some proud moments where I did stand up for someone else, but I also have many where I was infested with anxiety and did nothing.  Gross.

But I was afraid.  Certain kids scare the crap out of me, and still do.  The other day I found myself trespassing on the beach of the local country club around here.  The Munch wanted to go play on the swings they had, so what could I do but follow her.  I felt so out of place with these preppy little kids running around, and kind of wanted to shoot myself in the neck.  I tried to talk myself out of this infectious insecurity but it still lingered like herpes.  As much as I felt ridiculous for caring what these mini-replicas of their uptight parents thought of me, I couldn’t help myself.

“Who cares Toni, they are just kids. Albeit kids that wear khaki shorts and polo t-shirts, but they are children.  You can’t be intimidated by a 7-year old.”  But yet I was.

These were kids who probably would have snubbed me when I was a kid, and I could feel that timidity they would have ignited in my past self.  So much so that it was invading my present self.

It then got me thinking “what if these kids, or any kids for that matter, were mean to The Munch!?”  What if some little jerkface jerk was a jerk to my little jerk?  Even though nothing happened this fateful day and all this insanity was my own inner monologue, the thought of someone making Munch feel bad about herself made me so angry I almost slapped a random child across the mouth.

How do parents deal with kids being cruel to their kids? It isn’t exactly fair to verbally attack someone else’s child, but is it okay to secretly trip them or pee in their lemonade?

“Hey Mamma… you need to toughen up!”