The other day my friend came over with her baby who is two months younger than The Munch. I got to hold the baby, and you can tell he thought he had better places to be.
“He is just really hard to hold right now… all her ever wants to do is crawl”
“Crawl! He is crawling! The Munch doesn’t crawl yet!?”
I put baby Moses down, and sure enough, not only was he crawling, this baby was straight up break-dancing. All this while my baby was too lazy to even get up and see this display… she was too busy taking a nap. In the middle of the day mind you!
“He can’t sit up yet like the Munch though…” My friend was trying to be gracious. Yes, The Munch could sit up, but she wasn’t walking on her hands like this kid who was two- months younger!
I guess every parent has to realize at some point that some other kid is better than theirs, but that didn’t stop me from attempting to drill the diapers off of her.
“Okay Munch… you can do this!” And she would just look at me and pet the rug.
“Munch… don’t you have any ambitions?” Pat, pat, pat… “I like the texture of this rug” her eyes revealed to me.
The funny thing is, before Moses came over, I didn’t give a care that The Munch wasn’t crawling. What is it about comparing yourself, or your child, to another being that fosters competition? What about my knowing that a younger baby was crawling made me want my baby to crawl? If I didn’t know about Moses, I would have been fine lounging on the rug with The Munch counting stitches.
It doesn’t matter if someone is better than you, has a more glamorous life, a sexier lover… none of that changes what is going on in your life. I had a friend who whenever she ate a cookie, would hold me down and force-feed me to do the same. It was like she thought the cookie wouldn’t make her fat if I ate one too.
The more concerned we are with other people, the more distracted we become. We have to have expectations of ourselves beyond anyone else. Your greatest competitor should be you. Then life will forever be a journey to improve rather than a quest to compare. If we rely on others to be our motivation, what happens when you beat that person? Would you fill fulfilled, or full of dread not knowing where do direct your energy towards next? As long as you know that you can always to better than you, you will continue to push yourself with each accomplishment a reminder of your limitless potential.
Right now The Munch may not be the most driven baby you ever met, but at least she knows a good quality rug…
(Moses about to do a head spin)
“YOU CAN DO THIS!!”