On Friday I was having one of those days where the only thing that would calm my mind was fantasizing about mass homicide. I was just really on edge. Not only because of my moon menses time of the woman pushing its way out of my ripe uterus, but also because my back really hurt and that made me feel frail, like Mr. Burns. The Munch was also being really emotionally high maintenance, and my fragile state did not make a recipe for patience and understanding.
I had plans to hang out with my friend Sarah, and her daughter Marquetta, to go to a drum and dance circle to celebrate the new moon and be all one with the universe and shit! But I really didn’t want to go – I couldn’t be sure that The Munch wasn’t going to be a dick. Going anywhere with your kid is always a risk because you can never anticipate how they are going to behave. They could be totally agreeable and independent, or clingy and super duper crazy next level annoying. It is kind of like playing craps because you never know if you are going to win, and your kid also probably smells faintly like crap because they are really bad at wiping their own ass.
As much as I doubted The Munch being good company, I also couldn’t promise that I wouldn’t be a total bitch. I looked in the mirror and my face just looked cunty. But I didn’t want to flake on her either, so I drove the 2 hours with my back throbbing and having really low expectations. I figured that The Munch would probably be needy, and I would have to sit with her and feel uncomfortable with my dumb stupid back pain. I pretty much resigned to the idea that I wouldn’t get to do what I wanted, but at least I would be around the vibration of the drums, and that would maybe have some sort of healing effect.
Of course Sarah and Marquetta were dressed in gorgeous matching belly dancing outfits, while Munch was wearing a stained dress and I still had my pajama pants on under my skirt. Luckily I found Munch’s fairy dress in the car, so one of us could represent… and thank goddess Sarah had glow in the dark bracelets and sparkles! In case you were wondering, sparkles and glow in the dark accessories is a sure fire way to make you feel like a lady!
I brought munch out the dance floor. There were about 25 drummers, and the sound was so loud it was penetrating every cell. I started to dance, and at first Munch just looked around at the scene – not sure if she was into it. But then she got her baby, and started to dance with her a bit. As more people came on the floor, the more Munch got into it, and then she started getting down!!!!
Now I LOVE to dance… it is one of my favorite things to do. So The Munch does have to deal with my dancing quite a bit at home. She comes to my classes, and she has to hang out while I rehearse. But we have never gone dancing together in a context like this. It was so amazing to share this part of my life with her – that we could both enjoy the music and wiggle our bodies around. Munch wasn’t expecting anything out of me, looking for me to entertain her, or to make sense of it all. She was having her own physical experience, and letting me have mine. And for 2 hours we sweated, swayed, wriggled, jumped, and I think she even twerked a bit.
I have to say I am really grateful for these hippy communities that do stuff like this. Even though it is not “kid friendly” in the sense that everyone brings their kids, but it is kid friendly in the sense that some people bring their kids – and no one minds. They even appreciate their presence. There are not a lot of places that you can share this type of experience with your child. It is not like you could bring your kid to the club or the bar.
Even though hippy white people are kind of dangerous when they start dancing to African drum rhythms, with their limbs flailing at alarming speeds, and The Munch almost getting stomped on by a woman with flowing robes dancing with her eyes closed – it was still an epic night. And you know what? I danced my bitchy mood away, and my hurt back!!!