Annoying Things Parents Do

There are a lot of annoying things that parents do.  I know this because I am around a lot of parents, and also because I am sure I too can be an annoying parent.  But I would like to think my annoying parent-ness is cool, and ironic, and makes me look skinny.

But every so often I think it is important to point these things out… for example:

Hanging out with people that have kids can be somewhat awkward.  You want to spend time with the adult in question, but then there is this other tiny person eavesdropping on everything you say.  Staring at you with wide eyes and an expecting expression, saying nothing, judging your every move.  It gets kind of weird.

So because you don’t want to be a total dick and ignore the miniature human, you might ask them a question about themselves.  Keep in mind your intention is to engage the child, make them feel like they are participating, and part of the group.  So you might say…

“So, little Suzie, do you have a best friend at school?”  And then you wait patiently for Suzie to understand what you are asking and come up with an answer… but then suddenly, after a slightly long pause, the parent ends up replying for their child!

“Suzie you have a best friend don’t you honey? Her best friend is this girl Rebecca.  She is very sweet.”

Oh no, you don’t get it.. I actually don’t give a shit.  Do you really think I care about Suzie’s best friend Rebecca? Like I was on the edge of my seat waiting to hear about Suzie’s social situation in kindergarten? NO! I was just trying to be nice to your kid by involving them in the conversation!

I get it though. I am sometimes in this exact situation. Someone will ask Munch a question like what her dolly’s name is, and she just stares at them with her finger up her nose.  Yeah, it is kind of uncomfortable, but she will answer the question… eventually!  She just doesn’t care if there is a major lull in the conversation because she is a child and they have no sense of time.

“Hey Munch… who the hell is that guy behind you? Oh sorry, I see you are quite busy picking your nose.  Take your time answering me.”

  • http://WebsiteURL gita

    Yes, my question exactly. Munch: who the hell is the guy behind your mom??? You all act like he’s completely normal, just sitting around the table like everyone else….meanwhile I have a heart attack every time I walk in the room and see broke necked cowboy from the corner of my eye.
    the insanity of this perfect moment was captured quite well. :)

  • http://WebsiteURL holly

    What’s the matter Gita? Is it his shirt or hand tooled vest? Nothing is more annoying than parents hurriedly answering for their children.

  • http://WebsiteURL Emily

    I feel like I should explain that the Bunny Bars were NOT for me. I wouldn’t dare touch one because I already have an addictive personality.