Girls have to wipe every time they go to the bathroom. Unlike men, who get to shake off the majority of their elimination processes, women have to go through the motion with each excretion experience. If I were to calculate, a chick pees about 5 times a day, (because everyone knows that girls don’t poop), so you take 5, multiply that by the amount of days you are alive, and that means a heck of a lot of wipes.
During my most recent sweep across my lady parts, I realized something very significant about my bathroom strategy. Every time I am peeing, before I am done, I always reach for the toilet paper. That means that during my mid-pee, I am spending mental energy unraveling and negotiating the thin sheets, rather than focusing on the release.
Why don’t I wait until the pee has been fully expelled into the bowl? Why must I multi-task during this precious procedure? And do I ever truly empty my bladder if I am always slightly contorting and manipulating the modern day papyrus for the pussy?
But my point is the human tendency to start one thing before finishing another; the ever-lingering susceptibility of living five minutes in the future. No matter what is going on, you are wondering what is going to happen next.
Of course the solution is as simple as it is complex. Live the moment, be one with what is happening, and all that jazz. But this idea is so abstract. What does it mean to truly be in the now when we live in a culture so saturated with stimulus? And how can all this distraction be simultaneously so boring? Is it possible to reconcile that even though the answer is so obvious, it is also so obviously hard to accomplish?
Maybe I need to just drip dry?